This sweatshirt smells like you and it's the perfect thing for how I feel right now. Today was great but now no one's home and I'm scared of kidnappers and the dark, and frankly, I'm lonely. Everything today flew by so quickly. 15 hours ago I was taking a test in Algebra 2 and now I'm here. Sleep, shower, coffee, school, 1st block, test, half of 2nd block, funeral, Anna's, Davis's I-pod is really good, Mangiamo's, Melanie's, home, Planet Smoothie, beach, Bridget, Frosty, Squires Gate, B&N, somewhere else, home, Nick and Norah, burglary, home. Here.
I wish what happened to her didn't. She didn't deserve it. I can't think of anyone who does, but when things like that happen to people like her, it makes be believe even less in god. I don't even know whether to capitalize the "g" anymore or not. They used to teach us in elementary school to ALWAYS capitalize "g" and "h" in "him" when talking about it. I don't even care anymore.
I hung out with someone I haven't in a long time. It was really nice and I would like to do it again, but maybe just a sleep over with me and her. I miss the way things were sometimes. I don't want to go back to it but I just miss those days. I get sad and nostalgic thinking about it sometimes, but doesn't everyone about some time in their life? Whatever.
I'm not saying I'm not happy. I'm SO happy. It's shameful how happy I am. I love my life, and I love a certain person in it. Next year is my (our) senior year, and after that is our life together and I can't wait to get it all started. It's been 16 months and a week, that's more than 500 days and every day I find something new to love about her. She's always surprising me and giving me something to smile about; making me laugh and grin and giggle, and my heart beat faster and my stomach fill up with butterflies. It's crazy. I feel selfish and undeserving when I think about it, but who cares? I fucking love it. I'm never giving up this feeling for anything and I know we're going to have the brightest future any two people can ever have. We're different. I don't care what anyone says. They're just all jealous and probably a little bit scared, but you know what? I'm a little scared too. My life has never been this hopeful before. I've lost all hope in most people in my life because some people are not worth the effort. It's not worth trying to change them. But this is good for me. She's the love of my life; nothing can ever get as good as things are with her :)
Alright I'm done with this.
I need sleep.
1 comment:
this blog made me smile.
i think its because its nice to know that true love still does exsist.
as for anna, i don't know her, but i almost cried when i heard. her reputation as the sweety she is precedes her. and her story makes me worry about my own life.
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