There could be nothing better than making you my bride and slowly growing old together.

Hiiiii :)
I just got home from hanging out with Blake and my girlfriend. It's Wednesday of the 2nd week of school, and not too much has changed. I find myself starting to get upset over the littlest things though, and I don't know what to do.
There's someone I'm kinda friends with, and they've recently done something to make me angry. It wasn't that big of a deal, but now it's turned into this huge thing. I confided in one person and told them why I was upset, and suddenly everyone knows about it. They're making it seem like I completely hate this person. That's not true at all, I've calmed down since it's happened. Everyone talking about it makes me more and more upset though, and today, something was said that made me want to cry. For a while now, some people I hang out with have been saying how all their old friends have abandoned them and gone their seperate ways. Some of them have gotten really into drugs and stuff, and their old friends have been pretty upset over it. They always talk about how it used to be and everything they used to do, and how much they miss it. Especially someone I'm really close to. One of the reasons they've been upset lately is because they feel like they don't have a solid group of friends anymore.
So today we were in Subway when the person I "hate" came up, and someone said "Yes you do, Catie, you hate him. Now it's gonna be like February again," and February was when everyone started drifting apart. I feel like it's all my fault now, and I reallllly really don't want it to be. I feel so selfish and bitchy too, 'cuz everyone's been so emotional about that situation. I don't know if this is making any sense to you, but I feel like shit. It's been one thing after another, and I feel like everything's been falling apart. Like, I'm seriously ruining everything for everyone. I mentioned once that I was sick of going to Barnes and Noble everyday, and BAM! we don't go there anymore. I said someone was annoying me, and now they're annoying other people. And no ones the way they used to be, just because I had to open my big mouth and say something. It's completely my fault.
My girlfriend is never happy anymore and I try soo hard to cheer her up, but it's not as easy as it looks. I know we're both here for each other, but stuff like that doesn't just go away overnight. Other friends of mine are having problems too. Especially when SO MUCH is going on at once, I feel like I'm stuck in a hole.
I don't even know what else to say. I guess "theres only one way to go, and that's up" or whatever. I don't even know how that saying goes. I don't care though.

I might go lay down or something.
My birthday's in exactly a week :) that's something to look forward to.
Melanie wants to help me plan a dinner at Spice or somewhere. I don't know who I'd invite though :/

I'll write laterrrrrr.

And there was a time when all I wanted was my ice cream colder and a little cream soda.

So, I've made it through my first week of school. It wasn't so bad, I guess. We're on a new A-B schedule, which means that we switch classes every day. It's like 1-2-3-4 Monday, then 5-6-7-8 Tuesday, then 1-2-3-4 Wednesday. It's not as bad as I thought, but I still don't like it.
I really liked my first day, A-Day, because it was exciting, and I liked all my classes. B-day was really lame though. I really didn't like any of my classes, and I only knew a few people in my lunch. When I got home, I just climbed into bed and ended up sleeping for 13 hours.
That was the only really bad day I had last week. The rest was pretty good. I just hope it stays this way for a while. I had a nice summer, so it would be good if my school year didn't completely suck.
This weekend was good. I saw Kara every day. Friday, she came home with me and we watched Charlie Bartlett and a little of Just Friends. Yesterday I went to her house, and the Haley Powell picked us up, and we hung out at her house before going to Barnes and Noble. Today Blake and Kara came over for a little bit, and then we went to Terry's house. We met Haley at Burger King after leaving Terry's, and then we headed out to Bluffton. We went to Old Navy and World Market and stuff, and then we came back onto the island for Blake to get his car. Then we went to Wal-Mart for a couple minutes, but we all had to get home, so my mom picked up Kara and I, and Blake went home.
Tomorrow is school and I have my first soccer practice. I think that's kind-of exciting. My mom's been on my ass about how I just "hang out" with my friends all the time, and how I should find something to do. So yeah, the next couple of months are gonna be busy. I don't know if I want that though. I like being lazy.

I've just kind-of realized how hard it is to be happy or make someone happy. You can't just turn it off and on like a lamp. I wish you could though. I'm really worried about a friend of mine. I don't think they're gonna kill themselves or anything, but I just want them to be happy. I want to do whatever I can to make it happen, and I hope they know that. I know they'd do the same for me, but it's hard because I don't know what to do. They just need to know that I'm always here to talk to, and they can always count on me :)

Tomorrow should be interesting. I have soccer with someone I haven't seen in a really long time. I'm excited and all, but it's gonna be weird seeing her again, especially it's just gonna be us two.
I'm gonna go and fix something to eat. I'm hungryyyyy.
TTYL <3

High above the chimney tops, thats where you'll find me.

It's the last day of Summer 2008. I'm really sad about that, but I think I'm pretty prepared for school starting up. I'm not looking forward to it, but I'm not completely dreading it.
I think for the first time this summer, I'm almost completely content with everything. I don't want to jinx it or brag, but I'm feeling really good about the way things are turning out. This summer's made it pretty evident who's important to me and who actually cares about me. I've found people I have a good time with and actually get along with. I mean, nothings completely 100% perfect, but I guess it never really can be. I don't know, it's just that I'm cool with the handful of close friends I have left, and I've been hanging out with a lot of nice people lately. Hopefully it'll turn into more opportunities for hanging out because I'm really enjoying it.
I've managed to surround myself with some pretty chill people, and I'm really happy. Or at least the happiest I've been this summer.

I've learned a lot this summer, and so so so much has changed. I wasn't sure before, but I know now that I'm fine with the way things went. The people who aren't as close to me anymore are fine that way, because they were obviously moved there for a reason. I'm not pointing fingers at anyone or saying that I'm not to blame, but think about it. I don't want to get hurt anymore.
I just hope this school year makes things better and doesn't bring in any unnecessary drama or anything.
And now, as I've said before, I'm gonna focus my attention on making my friends feel better. I want things to stay the way they are for a while, so I'm gonna make sure my friends stay close and trust me and stuff.

:) <3

You said I make you laugh? Well you make my heart sing.

So I'm home from Daytona. I had an okay time. I'm just glad to be home.
Tuesday was so much fun. I got out of the house around 12, and my mom dropped me off at Kara's where we watched a movie and stuff. Then we left in the rain to go to Burger King. There we met Alex and Cody, who are two really cool kids. Then we went to Magiamo's (sp?) for pizza, and when we were there, Melanie called me. She was like "Oh, I'm at Burke's Pharmacy", and Burke's just happened to be right outside the pizza place. So I went to go see them but they went to get ice cream, and I wanted to go back with Kara, Alex, and Cody. By then Blake had gotten there, so after we paid, we all piled into his car and went to Barnes and Noble. We hung out there for a while, but then my mom randomly called and said I needed to be picked up. I really didn't want to go, so I convinced her to let me stay. Then we went to Wal-Mart to buy Blake a remote control plane and then to Allenwood to play with it. We went out in the big high school soccer field, and we spent the next couple of minutes throwing around a plate we stole from Magiamo and getting the plane out of trees. It started raining hard though, so we found shelter on this porch of some house. The night ended after we went to the Rec Center to fly the plane some more, dropped Kara off, then went back to Cody's where I forgot my purse, then stopped at the convenient store for Teddy Grahams and soda. I had a lot of fun.
Wednesday and today were pretty terrific too. I went to dinner with Melanie, Aaron, and Van at Mi Tierras. Then I spent the night at Melanie's where we made vblogs and prank phone calls! When I woke up though, I talked to my mom who said I had to come home and clean my room. Around 2 Melanie came over to help because it was taking way too long. When we were finished, we went to Outback to meet Haley Powell, Terry, Hannah, Harry, and Ricky...? I think his name was Ricky. I don't really remember. The only thing he said the whole time was "Cheeseburger, please".
Anyway, I had a good time hanging out with them. We just drove around and stuff.
When we got back to Melanie's house around 8, I called my mom to ask if I could stay longer and dye her hair for her. I was supposed to be at my house at 8, but Melanie lives right down the street from me, so I figured it would be okay. She said I was grounded though, which sucks. School starts in 3 days :(
I don't want to be one of those teenage kids who's the outcast of their families and stuff, but I'm really only happy when I'm with my friends. My family just makes me upset when I'm with them, and I hope it doesn't stay that way forever.

I also hope I'm not really grounded tomorrow, because I bought Kara a bunny rabbit for our anniversary, and I want to pick it up tomorrow.

this is my favorite song right now :)


this made me ROFL.


Me and Melanie.
Something you should look at


I don't know when I'm gonna write again,
because I don't really care since no one really reads this anyway.
I just hope these next 3 days don't suck.

And I cannot sleep without the radio on.

Okay. I changed my mind. I'm actually not that upset about going to Florida. I wish Kara could go with me though. I'm gonna miss her even though it's only a couple of days.

So anyway, sorry for the little fit I had Wednesday.

This guy makes the coolest videos I've seen a long time,
so watch them.


I'll write when I get back :)

We still compliment eachother, like colors in harmony that make eachother look brighter.

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I don't want to go to Daytona. I don't want to go to Daytona. I don't want to go to Daytona. I don't want to go to Daytona. I don't want to go to Daytona. I don't fucking want to go to Daytona.
I just found out today that we're leaving Friday morning. It's Wednesday night. I knew we were going after we got back from New York, but I didn't realize it was so soon.
I want to stay here with Kara and Bridget and Melanie, who's coming home the day after I leave, and Blake and Terry and Haley and Timmy and Martha and Corinne and everyone else I've been hanging out with the past couple of days.
WAHHHHH! I don't wanna gooooooo. I feel like stomping around and throwing stuff like a little 3 year old. I've been having a really good time since I got home, and I'm feeling really good about everything I wasn't before. I don't want to go and ruin it by spending another couple of days with my family. It makes me so frustrated and I want to cry. All my family talks about is how I'm always in a bad mood and how I'm just a "moody teenager" and shit. They need to get their heads out of their asses and actually realize what's going on. I don't want to be there. If they made it more enjoyable for me then I'd be in a better mood. And plus, when I am in a good mood, they're just like "Why are you so bi-polar? One minute you want to kill us and the next you're laughing and having a good time". Why can't they just be happy with it? Honest to god, the more I think about this, the more I get upset. I really don't want to fucking go.

Yesterday was so much fun. I left my house around 3 to meet up with Timmy and Taylor down in Coligny, but they had to leave at 5 to go home. So I called Kara and she came down, and while we were walking around, I saw my buddies Martha and Corinne. After Timmy and Taylor left, Kara and I ended up sticking with Martha and Corinne for the rest of the day. We left the pool and decided to go to fireworks, so I drove home with Martha and Kara went home with Corinne.
I showered and got dressed and stuff, and Martha picked me back up an hour-or-so later. Before going to fireworks, Martha and I swung by La Hacienda to pick up some beverages. I guess I got pretty ditsy because I don't really remember much after that. I remember screaming and spilling something when we saw Kara & Corinne, I remember sitting in the playground of McDonald's, and I remember being in Martha's car. I guess we dropped Kara off at her aunt's because by the time we got to Martha's, she was gone. I ended up spending the night at Martha's where we spent the next couple of hours playing Bop-it and darts, watching movies, making pancakes, squishing cockroaches, spraying her cat with water, and other fun things. When I fell asleep, they were watching random ladies give birth on the Discovery Health channel.
I woke up around 10 and went home to watch my sisters so my mom could go to a meeting. When she got home, she took my sisters and I out, and they went to the arcade and my mom and I went to the mall. While we were there, Blake called and asked if I wanted to chill. I absolutely did, so he picked me up at my house a while later. Then we picked up Kara from her aunt's and went to Mellow Mushroom for dinner. After that we just went around doing random stuff, and I was home around 9:30.
My point is, the past 3 days I've been home have been the greatest. I just want to keep enjoying it before school starts up in less then 2 weeks. I hate my family for making me go to Daytona. It's not going to be fun at all.

I need to see Kara tomorrow. I've seen her almost every day since I've been back, but I feel like I haven't really. Its almost like I miss her, especially since I was gone for 2 weeks and we haven't really been alone since I left.

I guess I'll get off the computer now. It's late and I want to wake up early tomorrow and start planning my day.

Oh, you are the roots that sleep beneath my feet and hold the earth in place.

I'M HOME :D
I'm very happy to be here and my first day back was pretty amazing. It was hot as hellll though, and that is the one and only thing I miss from New York. It was gorgeous up there and the weather was perfect. Then when we got down here, it was like BAM! hotness. It sucks.
My girlfriend is sick and I'm really worried about her. She passed out and her chinchilla died all in the same day, and I feel terrible that I wasn't there for her when it happened. She has to go to the hospital soon and get tests done, and I hope that happens soon because it's really serious.
So today was quite eventful. I woke up around 9 and took a shower because everyone had to go to the high school to get their schedules and stuff. After I got out of the shower, Kara called me and we talked about meeting at the high school, and me leaving with her and her mom to down to Coligny. I got to the high school around noon and got my classes for next year, and then I saw Kara and we left with her mom. When we got to Coligny, we walked around and talked to some cool people like Courtney, Courtney's sister, Courtney's sister's friend, Blake Cooler, and this really nice Asian guy named Chris! We tried getting in to some hotels but it didn't really work out too well. One of them needed a code to get in, so we left. We caught this lady getting into the elevator of another one, so we walked around the inside of that one for a while. When we got out to the pool, we followed this family in because we didn't know the code to get into it. When we got in though, we needed a code to get out too, so we sat around inconspicuously until someone left. After that we walked around Coligny for a while longer, then went to Hinchey's to chill in the AC, then walked to the Dollar Store and Bi-Lo. At the Dollar Store we bought a little suction cup archery set and went to Bi-Lo to try it out. Kara got it suck to a bunch of stuff, but I couldn't, so I just put it in my purse. Then Blake called and said he'd pick us up before we went to Kara's aunt's house to get his hair cut. So we went there and Blake got his hair cut by Kara's cousin, and Haley Powell and Terry showed up. From there we went to Haley's house and hung around playing pool, messing with Blake's hair, and trying to solve Rubik's Cubes.
Haley decided she wanted to go to dinner, so after piling into Blake's car, getting into a lot of trouble with her neighbors for speeding, and my mom calling and freaking me out; we finally got to La Hacienda. We ate and Kara and I got dropped off at Park Plaza to see a movie. We ended up not having enough money, so we walked around there for a couple hours. We saw Dakota Wilson at her work and Brittnay Johnson, Lisa Kasmir, and LEEMOR BENNY! I haven't seen Leemor in a while, so that was nice.
There wasn't a lot we could do around Park Plaza without any money or a desire to dance like a whore at Teen Night, so I called my mom and she picked us up around 11.

My mom is such a bitch. For the past 2 years, we've gone to Tennessee for my dad to race his car, and it always seems to fall on the day of my birthday. If you can't tell already, I freaking hate family vacations, and being stuck on one for my birthday sucks. So my mom and I were talking about it after dropping Kara off, and she was like "Well, I told your father that we won't be going this year, but after what I saw when I picked you up, I'm rethinking it". What did she see? NOTHING. She thought she saw me and Kara were sucking face, and she's punishing me for it on my 17th birthday. It just makes me mad and even more fed up with my family.
I leave for Daytona soon and I reallllllly don't want to go. I just want to stay here and enjoy my last couple of days in summer. It's almost over.

I'm tired so I'm gonna go to bed.
& sorry for the stupid emo blog before this one. I just get really upset, even though that seems to happen a lot, but still. I'm better now that I'm home.
:)