Well, it's been an interesting past couple of days. The flag thing is pretty much over. My mom and dad are talking again, and my mom's not mad at me for it anymore. I forgot my homework for Chemisty on Tuesday though, so I'm grounded for that. I really really hate being grounded. I hate that my parents have that kind of control over me. I missed one homework assignment and next thing you know, I'm stuck at home, forced to do everything my mom says. Now I remember why I hate being home so much. I'm usually out every weekend, so this is the first time I've been home in a while. Whatever. I'm just jealous of everyone who's out doing something right now. I want to be out there with them.
I had a nice talk with my best friend yesterday about what being "okay" really means. She was saying how people can act like nothing's bothering them, but nothing can ever really be completely okay. Like, how do you know when everything is really "okay"? Is it when you're completely, 100% happy with everything in your life? Is that even possible? I've realized that now more then ever. People bottle up stuff and never talk about their problems, but then it just gets worse and worse. Things can be "okay" in different ways though. Like, if you stop being friends with someone or something, it might not seem "okay", but it might turn out to be. You might've stopped being friends with that person because they're not as good of a friend as you thought. I know that good things always come out of bad situations, it just takes time and effort. I just wish people wouldn't let it just sit there and build up though. I know that's easier said then done, but I hope they know that I'm always here to talk to. If something isn't okay, I know I like talking about it with other people. Maybe it's not what anyone else likes to do, but letting it sit there and get bigger and bigger doesn't do a damn thing. I want people to count on me and stuff. Or I just want them to cheer up and try to see the good in things again.
I've been having this weird feeling lately, like something bad is about to happen. I get it sometimes when drama breaks out or...I don't know. It's a sinking feeling like you're on the edge of tears and your head feels heavy, and you don't feel like thinking about anything. I just hope it's nothing too disastrous, but maybe it's just me. I just don't feel good.
Kara's over her cold, which is good. I've had Footloose practice every day since it started, and it's cool because I usually get to see Kara before and after. I just love spending time with her so much. Someone asked me today if we're gonna get married :P I thought that was funny. We had our 8 month anniversary last Tuesday and she made me a really good CD. I made her one too, and she said she liked it. I know it's really early, but I want to go to prom this year, and I already have my dress picked out. I don't know yet though, so I might change my mind. I'm such a loser when it comes to planning big things. I always figure it out wayyy ahead of time. I guess I need to see what my date is wearing to decide (:
Oh, and apparently Travis Barker and DJ AM were in a fatal plane crash in South Carolina, and they're both in critical condition. How sad :(
The weather is soooo nice outside, so I think I'm gonna go do something besides sit on the computer. Melanie's supposed to be over in a couple minutes. I'll write more later!
I'm in a pretty good mood today considering everything that's happened since I last wrote on here. On Sunday when Terry and Blake came over, I let Terry have this old, ratty flag on the front porch. He wanted it to burn or something, so I just said "yeah" because it was useless anyway. Well, apparently my mom didn't think it was. She jacked it from her grandma's house a while ago, so she flipped out when she noticed it was gone. I took the blame for everything, and it finally got dropped. I figured everything was fine by Monday because my mom was being so nice. It turns out the only reason she was being nice is because she called Terry's mom when I was at school. I think it was to tattle on him or get some vengeance from it or something. I don't really know. When I found out she called Terry's mom, I got so angry. We had this huge screaming fight over it, and my dad finally stepped in to stick up for me. I didn't understand why she thought she needed to get one of my friends in trouble for something he didn't even know was wrong. I took the blame and everything and she seemed okay with it all, but she still had to make a big deal out of it. She called Terry's mom who was like "I can get one to replace it...we're so sorry...blah blah blah", but no. My mom wanted to take it further and get them to fish it out of the dump or something. Terry's mom said he and I can't hang out anymore because I was a bad influence, but that's just what my mom said. I don't believe what she says anymore. So Tuesday my dad drove me to school, and while I was there, my parents talked and she wants us out of the house. She said I'm 17 now and I need to find somewhere else to live, and she wants to get a lawyer to get my dad out. It's Wednesday now though, and she doesn't seem to be doing anything about it. My dad and I just stay out of the house for as long as we can, come home and sleep, then get out of the house by 7 in the morning. She's not here now. I think the whole situation was blown way out of proportion. It was a stupid flag that she stole from her grandmother, and I didn't even know that before I gave it to Terry. Whatever. I said I was sorry.
Everything's been okay besides that though. School's fun. Kara still has a cold, which I'm waiting impatiently for her to get over. I had my first Footloose rehearsal today and it was super fun.
I don't know what to think about my life right now. I'm just glad things aren't all completely falling apart. I have a few good friends I know I can count on, and that makes everything good. I got a buncha money from my grandparents for my birthday yesterday. I can't wait to go shoppingggggg ;D and the rest I'm putting away for a car.
Oh, and wtf is with that black hole thing in Switzerland?! I don't want to die! If you don't know what I'm talking about, read this: http://dsc.discovery.com/news/2008/09/10/black-hole-cern.html
I guess I'll get started on my homework now. Bye! <3
So, this weekend was definitely not as good as last week. It seems like it would be one of the worst I've had in a long time, but I'm actually not that upset. A lot happened since Friday, which we had off of school for the hurricane. I kinda got into a fight with a friend, and that got me pretty angry. I wasn't in that good of a mood to begin with and on top of that, my mom wouldn't let me go outside. Nothing ended up happening though. The hurricane completely missed us. Saturday was nice. I had a soccer game that we won, but it was maddddd hot outside. Afterwards, I went over to Kara's house, but we weren't there very long because her mom was coming, and it's always weird being there with her mom. From there, we walked to Main Street, then to the Walgreen's, Barnes & Noble, Dollar Store, and Wal-Mart area. It was fun just walking around with her. We seem to do that a lot, but I always like it. Kara got sick when we were in Wal-Mart though, the poor thing. But her voice sounds so cute when she's sick! I hope she gets better soon. Today was pretty lame. I woke up, and I wasn't even awake for 5 minutes before my parents decided to scream at me for stuff that never happened. They think I don't ever do my homework, which isn't true. A couple days ago, they made me try out for this musical at my school because I have "such a talent" that I "shouldn't let go to waste". They're convinced that i skipped out on the auditions and lied about the whole thing. I don't care that they don't believe me, because I did and they'll see that when I get call-backs, but just how they yell at me. It's like I'm 12 again, and it ticks me off. I'm not all like ohh, I'm 17 now. I'm an adult, but seriously. They talk to me like I'm a kid. I told my dad he was acting like a jerk, and he said he was gonna "slap that look off my face". Who says that? I know he would never ever hit me, but he's threatening it like it actually means something to me. They get so worked up over the stupidest things, and it's so unnecessary. Anyway, Kara and Alex came over for a Drama project we had to do. Then Terry and Blake stopped over, and even though they couldn't stay, it made me happy. I love my friends.
Whatever. I guess the truth will come out and my parents will trust me again, but I want things to get better like they were a week ago. Life has so many ups and downs, and I can't stand it.
Today's my birthdayyyyyy! I know it's lame to be sitting here writing a blog on the day of my birth, but we had school today and stuff and I'm not allowed to go downstairs because my family's decorating or icing the cake or something. I've cheered up a lot from my last post. Things are way better and looking back, it was pretty stupid writing about how sucky life was before. It wasn't the end of the world, and I'm definitely not worrying about what I was then.
We just came off a long 4-day weekend, and I couldn't be happier. So much happened and I had fun every single day. I saw Melanie and Kara most of the time, and I loooove those girls. I won't go into huge detail, but I had a blast. If this weekend is even just half as great, I would be completely happy.
I don't know if whoever is reading this knows it, but there's a huge hurricane coming my way. People are talking about evacuating and stuff, but school hasn't been called off, so nothing's definite. I know a lot of people who are leaving tonight though, and my parents were talking about leaving Thursday (tomorrow). We aren't anymore though 'cuz I guess it's turned into a tropical storm that's going to hit north of us around Saturday. Still though, that's pretty scary stuff. What if we evacuated but when we got back, everything was gone! AND I HAD TO MOVE AWAY AND NEVER SAW ANYONE AGAIN! Ha, I'm really glad it's not that big of a deal anymore. I don't want to move.
Yesterday my mom took me to see a house she was thinking about buying in the town over from us. I don't want to move there either. I like where I live and the school I go to and the friends I have. Especially Kara. She spent the night on Monday, which is weird because my mom doesn't even let my friend Bridget spend the night. I'm still soo happy she did though. It was so nice. This weekend really made me realize how much I love her. I hope everyone can find a love like this in their lifetime. I know I'm young, but I'm crazy for this girl. It doesn't bother me if someone doesn't understand or care, but it's an amazing feeling. I'm just so happy :)
I guess I'll stop now because I can't think of anything else to write about and I have homework to do. I'm gonna sneak downstairs too because I really really want some Doritos. <3
